Category: Life

Random thoughts at night…

May it be the moon, the stars, the darkness or that mysterious atmosphere deep in the night, thoughts and feelings always surge at this time of day, well, night. Haven’t written in a while because life has been pretty ordinary. I’ve been reading up on a lot of things that I want to learn on my own because I don’t have nor wish to spend the time or money to take classes and study. That desire isn’t strong enough. I’ve also been having doubts about wanting to travel and see the world mainly because even though I’ve been self-sufficient in teaching English and traveling, I feel like I should be looking for a long-term well-paying job to support my parents. My Dad’s work schedule has been cut in half (due to the economic recession of course) and it’s pretty much impossible for him to change jobs because his English isn’t that good. They sacrificed so much for my sister and I moving to the US. I know that we’re still pretty well off and they want me to see the world and I will. I just need to find a high-paying job that allows me to travel…right…shouldn’t be that hard…*roll eyes* *scoff*

NBA Playoffs have been sweeeeet, 8 games in 2 days. I love Family Guy, it was on earlier on Adultswim. Had a glass of milk and I’ve been eating spicy food…so damn good. The clock is ticking, I wish I was at the beach. The Fifth Element is on right now, Chris Tucker is funny…haha…ok, done rambling. Later gator.

2 weeks in

Haven’t eaten beans for 2 weeks…I miss casados…even though I’ve been eating SO WELL maaaaan. It’s great being back home, feels like I’ve never left. Siento extraño en que estoy rodeado de la gente quien habla solo ingles. Y también las programas que están en ingles pero no hay subtítulos. Y que no se atardece hasta mas tarde en la noche. Y que hace muchísimo frío! Es posible que voy a quedar aquí por 2 meses mas…y ya quiero viajar y ir a un nuevo lugar. Sip, algunos de mis mejores amigos están aquí y sip, mi familia también y la extraño, sin embargo, mi deseo de viajar y ver el mundo esta mucho mas fuerte que los demás. Bueno, cambia de tema…

…El desempleo aquí en California es muy grave. Todavía estoy buscando un trabajo a medio tiempo. La verdad es que siento malo porque mucho trabajo requiere que queda por lo menos 3 meses o mas y solo quedo 2 meses, no quiero mentir que voy a trabajar mas y después sale. Bueno, no importa…Cheers!

Letting go isn’t the end of the world…

It’s the beginning of a new life. 2 more days left until leaving Costa Rica behind for good. Bittersweet is really the only word to describe this feeling. Still don’t know what to do yet once I get home…I’ll figure it out when I get back…never the one who plans.

—> Just got back from buying some gifts downtown. It’s weird because it was probably the last time taking the Carmiol bus to downtown San Jose and walking down Avenida Central…which brought back many memories. San Jose has been my home for a long while and every time getting back to San Jose from the beach it feels like home, it’s comfortable and familiar and I know exactly where I am. Definitely immersed in the culture and everything now and like every other experience it has to end sometime. Even though I didn’t take any Spanish classes here and I’ve been teaching English almost every day, my Spanish still improved a lot. There’s only so much to learn in class. I also thought of more things that I’ve learned about Costa Rica:

34. You’re not supposed to throw toilet paper into the toilet, use the garbage bin.
35. Cover your mouth with your left hand and finger smack with the right hand while you laugh or something funny happens.
36. Ticos love checking out girls, and I don’t mean just looking top to bottom, their heads follow the girl left to right and right to left and their heads move in sync…it’s amazing really.
37. No army here.
38. Nightclub here doesn’t mean a bar/club/disco, it means a strip club.
39. Red light doesn’t mean shit here when there aren’t many cars.
40. Always support local businesses, even an extra dollar for tips means a lot here.
41. “Costa Rica Named First BioGem Country by NRDC”
42. Huge differences between the Caribbean Coast and the Pacific Coast.
43. They play soccer on basketball courts…
44. Honking is a warning to other drivers that you’re crossing an intersection so they don’t crash into you, it’s a signal, and they converse with it, especially cab drivers.
45. Pura Vida!

That’s about it really…this kinda marks the end of my journey here in Costa Rica…and so, here I am, packing up and getting ready to leave otra vez…

1:25 am, 3/9 ——-> Estoy disfrutando mis últimos momentos en Casa Luna y Costa Rica. En unas horas voy a salir para el aeropuerto, otra vez. Estoy triste y no voy a esconderlo. Este me ha pasado muchas veces y estoy acostumbrado. El fin nunca es el fin, es el comienzo de algo nuevo. Bueno ya, tengo que tomar una siesta porque estoy muy cansado de anoche.

Life is a series of rooms…

…and who we get stuck in the rooms with adds up to what our lives are (If you know where this is from you are my new best friend). It’s always the hardest to leave people behind. We hold the key to unlocking the door leading to other rooms. The door is there and ultimately we have to walk through it, can’t stay forever. Rooms can change and furniture can be rearranged, but the person living there stays the same. His or her appearance might change with time and might be deceiving but deep down inside, they’re still the same. People don’t change. They want to change. They want to believe that they can change but they don’t. Personality stays forever. It’s the decisions they make that give the illusion of change. Those decisions are what make us different.

Having said that, not sure where to go from here. The point is, my life has been very fortunate and blessed to be stuck with so many good people. Things I can take with me. Places I can revisit. It’s the people that I miss and will always miss. Live and treasure the moments of each day, especially today because it’s a gift, that’s why it’s called the present.

19 days and counting…

It’s been a while since I’ve felt the sensation of having to leave a place knowing that I won’t be back for a while (forever…possibly). I’m going to miss Costa Rica, especially friends and students who I’ve gotten to know. Some of them I might see again someday but others, the chances are pretty slim. Así es la vida. I’ve got my experience, my thoughts, and my memories to take with me…what more do I need? Don’t answer, that was rhetorical. In the meantime, I’m going to enjoy fully these few remaining days in this “Rich Coast” but first, some things I’ve learned here:

1. Pura Vida!
2. Que tuanis, mae!
3. Do not rely on the buses here, they’re NEVER on time.
4. However, the buses go everywhere in the country and it’s the cheapest way to travel without a car.
5. Things are done in Tico time (meaning NEVER on time), even the government.
6. Cajero automáticos (ATMs) suck and have LONG lines.
7. Chicas are Ba-ba-ba-beautiful.
8. Pura Vida!
9. Roads suck, 8 out of 10 have huge ass holes which a car has to zig-zag through.
10. PDA(s) are seen everywhere, it is normal…you are supposed to have make-out sessions in the middle of the street.
11. Girls LOVE boots here.
12. Taxi meter is called “Maria”, always ask for it when getting in a cab.
13. Cacique Guaro (Local liquor) tastes HORRIBLE, similar to Aquadiente in Spain, but SO CHEAP.
14. Gallo Pinto for breakfast, lunch, brunch and dinner. Everyday.
15. Pura Vida!
16. Casados con chuleta, pollo, o carne de res (Rice and beans, plátanos, salad and tortillas) son muy buenos.
17. Guanabana (Local fruit).
18. Fruits are VERY sweet.
19. Ticos LOVE 80’s music, and I mean LOVE as in hearing it on TV, in clubs, on buses, in cabs, and in sodas and restaurants.
20. Fast food restaurants especially McDonalds are COOL and the place to hang out…
21. Think Americans are fat and lazy? Burger King DELIVERS here, right to where you live.
22. Saprissa vs Liga (Also Alajuela). Local soccer teams are the best ones.
23. Ticos do NOT like Nicos…
24. The Police here don’t do anything…Pay them 10 – 20 dollars they’ll let you go.
25. Imperial (Costa Rican beer) tastes like piss…seriously.
26. It’s uncanny and probably applies to Latin America in general, but people here look like people back home…only darker…SO many of my students look like someone I know back home…
27. Do not say you are from America…because Central and South America IS part of America.
28. They LOVE Obama here!
29. Every other store is a shoe store.
30. Everyone knows salsa.
31. No street names…address is the number of blocks E S W N from a landmark.
32. Ticos do not know how to give directions…they know the place, they know how to get there, but they can’t give directions.
33. Pura Vida!

Can’t really think of any more for now…so I’ll leave it as that.

(Near) future plans

3/12 – Leave for home
—–> Save up for Chile: Part-time? Tutor? Spanish Classes? Self-Study?
5/30 – Chile English Open Doors
——–> 6/15 First day teaching
——–> 7/17 – 7/31 Winter Break
——–> 8/3 – Second Term
——–> 11/20 – Last day
——–> 11/28 – Leave for home

Chile —–> Travel to Argentina, Peru, Bolivia, Uruguay, Brazil (If possible)

12/2009 – Stay home for Christmas

1/2010 – 6 months in Spain

6/2010 – Africa World Cup (Travel Africa if possible)

Start French – 8/2010 – France? Canada? —–> 1 year (Travel Europe)

8/2011 – Done with Spanish/French – Master’s? Peace Corps? (Japanese, Italian, Portuguese) – 2 years

After Master’s/Peace Corps – Teach in Asia – 1 year (Travel Asia)

12/21/2012 – If the World doesn’t end…(And it won’t)

———-> Just some thoughts and plans…

A special entry / Una entrada especial

I figured I’d write this entry in both English and Spanish since I’m starting to have so many friends who only speak Spanish.

Tears are the blood of the soul as San Agustín said, and eyes are the windows to the soul. I don’t shed tears anymore. As I’ve said many times before, I’ll never stay and I understand that. I am and will always leave people, places, and things I’ve got to know behind. Tears will not stop that from happening. It’s interesting because some of my students asked me about my plans for the future and after I told them, the first advice that I got was that it’s pretty much impossible for me to sustain a relationship because of my constant desire to travel and move from place to place. People say it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all…I say it’s best to just not love at all. Pain and damage to the heart will never heal. It really hurts. I don’t mean to be sentimental but it is how it is. I learned to live with it. I would love more than anything in the world to leave it to fate except the thought of not having control over my life I really cannot stand. The point is, I try to move on. I try to not let my heart be involved. I tried and failed. Feelings past. It’s always hard but I’ll heal. Though it won’t be the same ever again.

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Supuse que escribiría esta entrada en ambos ingles y español puesto que empiece tener mas amigos quien hablan solo español.

Las lágrimas son la sangre del alma como dijo San Agustín, y los ojos son el espejo del alma. Ya no derramé ningunas lágrimas. Como he dicho antes muchas veces, nunca voy a quedarme y eso me entiendo. Siempre voy a dejar atrás la gente, los lugares y las cosas que me había familiarizado. Las lágrimas no pueden evitarlo de eso. Me fascina porque unos de mis estudiantes me preguntaron sobre mis planes en el futuro y después de les conté, el primero consejo que me dijeron era que es casi imposible mantener una relación por mi deseo constante de viajar y cambiar a otros lugares. Dice que es mejor ha amado y ha sufrido un desamor que no ha amado nunca…bueno, digo que es lo mejor no ama nunca. El dolor y el daño a la corazon nunca curarán y le duele mucho. Eso es lo que sea. Aprendido vivir con eso. Me encantaría dejarlo al destino más que todo el mundo menos que no puedo creer en que no tengo control sobre mi vida. El hecho es que trato continuar con la vida. Trato de no deja mi corazón involucrada. Traté y fracasé. Sentimientos pasan. Siempre es difícil pero voy a curar. Aunque no vaya a ser lo mismo nunca.

Well…it’s 2:42 am…it’s late (or early)…I’m going to bed.

Bueno…ya es 2:42…muy tarde (o temprano)…voy a dormirme.

The Inauguration of Barack Obama

I’ve been in the US for almost 10 years. The first year doesn’t really count since I didn’t know any English let alone politics. Then 4 years of high school and 4 years of university, all under Bush’s administration. It’s going to be very interesting to experience something else, something new.

Many students that I’ve taught asked me about Obama. Every one of them loved Obama. There are many expectations of Obama and his administration to bring “change”. Most people think that after Obama, well now President Obama (so weird to say that) takes over, things will start changing with a snap of a finger. This ditch that we’re in is going to take time for us to climb out. One person can’t change everything. Obama represents change, and that in itself brings hope to the people. Obama is not going to meet all these expectations in his first administration. It takes TIME.

Anyway, this is history right here. I’m glad I have the chance to witness something like this.

God Bless America!

Out of sight, out of mind

Not really.

Too tired right now…I’ll expand on it later.

—–> 4 days later…

Solo cuando no hay aun un secundo para pensar. Algunos pueden ahuyentar todos los pensamientos pero no lo puedo. Es difícil porque me cuesta mucho tiempo dormirme, aunque sea cansado. Dice que si no lo soñarle se vuelve loco, quizás, porque todos lo que obtiene el mente subconsciencia durante el día están en el mente pero la consciencia no los trata entonces, la subconsciencia los trata cuando la consciencia está descansado en la noche. Y esos pensamientos se forman los sueños. A veces las cosas que pensó todo el día se forman los sueños también. Hay un dicho en Chino que dice “lo que piensa en el día, lo piensa en sueño”. Bueno.

Seis días…porque solo es ella. Aunque sea por un minuto.